Pickle. (18+Ish)

Please, enjoy this story that is loosely based on a conversation/incredibly silly moment I experienced at Megaplex 2025. Bonus points to anyone who can figure out which character is taking the place of me in the scenario!

(Also, enjoy the return of Darius and Scotty. I’m happy to be able to feature them on the blog again.)

“We’ve got a veggie burger for the bird.” The waiter, a rabbit in a red vest, place a plate down in front of Scotty.

“Thanks, man.” Scotty grinned, looking down at his plate. His feathers fluffed out in shock as his gaze settled on the plate. His eyes narrowed and he squeezed his beak shut.

The rabbit moved behind Scotty’s chair to place a dish in front of Darius. “A grilled chicken club for the lion.”

Darius grinned at him. “Thank you, Todd.”

Todd smiled back, “My pleasure, sir.” His gaze lifted to the shark and the maned wolf across the table. “And for my favorite regulars, I got two bacon burgers.” He winked, moving around the table with the other two plates. “Adrian’s has the side salad.”

The maned wolf wiggled his fingers, his tail swishing behind him. “Oooooo!”

“And—”

“Fries for Javier!” The shark flashed Todd a toothy grin.

Todd chuckled, putting the plate down. “Of course.” He folded his paws in front of his apron and surveyed the four of them. “Is there anything else I can get you folks today?”

“We’re good over here, I think.” The maned wolf looked to his shark, his paw sliding toward his plate. “Right?”

“Yeah, no. This should be good for now.” Javier lightly smacked Adrian’s paw. “Don’t even think about it.”

Scotty wasn’t completely paying attention to the others. His eyes were fixated on his plate. There wasn’t anything wrong with the veggie burger. In fact it looked delicious. A black bean patty with garlic aioli, provolone cheese, lettuce, and tomato. And the fries were those nice wavy cut ones that were crispy, just the way he like them.
No. The problem was sitting off the side of the plate. A large spear of pickle.

Scotty made a face and poked at it with his finger.

“Scotty?” He heard Darius clearing his throat.

The flamingo looked up and around the table at his friends. “Huh? What’s up?”

“You need anything else?” Darius raised a brow at him.

“Nah, I’m good!” He shook his shoulders, smoothing out his fluffed up feathers. “Thanks again!”

Todd nodded, “Of course. And if you guys need anything else, just flag me down. Enjoy your food.” He turned and walked away to one of his other tables.

Javier picked up his burger. “Thanks for coming to meet us here, guys. We know it’s a bit expensive as far as burgers go—”

“But the food is fantastic and the service is even better.” Adrian finished Javier’s sentence.

“Thank you Adrian.” Javier chuckled.

“You’re welcome, Javi.”

“Yeah.” Darius picked up his own burger. “Todd seems pretty nice. He’s got this cool air of familiarity with you.”

Scotty’s attention went back down to his plate, using his finger to push the pickle as far away from his burger as he could without getting the juice on anything.

“We’ve been getting Todd since we first started coming here. He’s a good kid. Worth every dollar we give him.” Javier looked down at his plate, gently smacking Adrian’s paw away again. “Babe, why didn’t you get fries if you wanted them?”

Adrian pulled his paw and back and let out a pitiful whimper. “They taste better when they’re yours though!”

Darius grinned. “Why not just get a side of fries then switch them with his?”

“But all the fun is in taking them from him!” Adrian complained.

“Yeah, you love taking things from me, dontcha?” The shark growled softly, nudging him playfully.

“Hey, do any of you want my pickle?” Scotty said suddenly.

He was met with silence.

Confused, he lifted his head and looked around the table.

Darius had a paw over his muzzle, and his shoulders were shaking with veiled laughter.

Adrian’s eyes were narrowed as he stared at the flamingo.

And Javier? Javier wore a playful smirk as he rested his chin on his hand. “Ah. You want to give one of us your pickle, eh?” He voice shook a little as he tried to contain his laughter.

Darius squealed and buried his muzzle in his arms, finally letting his own laughter spill out. “Oh my god, stoooop!”

“What?” Scotty looked between them all again. “What’s so—” His eyes widened as he realized what they were teasing him for. “Oh my god! No! That’s not—”

“Now, Scotty…” The scowl on Adrian’s muzzle twitched. “Ain’t you in a relationship? Do I need to call up that fox of yours?” The wolf was barely able to hide a teasing smirk. “Maybe let him know you’re trying to give us your pickle.”

Scotty buried his beak in his feathers. “Oh my god.” He groaned “No! Get your minds out of the gutter!” He took a deep breath, trying to contain his own laughter. “I just wanted to know if anyone wanted to take my pickle.”

Darius gently hit the table with his closed fist, lifting his head and taking a deep, shaky breath. “Stop offering us your pickle!” He choked out, before burying his muzzle back in his arms.

“Whoa, Scotty!” Adrian put his paws up. “Now you’re saying you want one of us to just take your pickle! You’re going to have to find someone else to take your pickle, buddy.” He threw an arm over Javier’s shoulder. “I already have one of my own.”

Javier grinned. “Technically two.”

Scotty sputtered, laying his head down and covering his beak with his wings as he finally broke, “God Dammit!”